Encouragement matters.

When you see something good, or see someone using their talents or gifts for the good of others, please show these people some love by letting them know.

And I don’t just mean saying, “Good job!”

Anyone can say that – whether they experienced something good or not.

No. To make encouragement meaningful (and believable), specify what was good about what you experienced. Tell the person

1. How it impacted you
2. What specifically you liked or what specifically moved you

You may not realize this, but there are a ton of creative people out there doing amazing things – maybe even touching or impacting you – and they have no idea whether they are reaching anyone with their work.

Tell them.

The truth is that most creative people don’t get meaningful feedback.

Hugh Macleod’s first rule of how to be creative is probably right: Ignore everyone. To be creative, you do need to ignore everyone – at least what they are telling you to do. Instead, we have to listen to that still, quiet voice to direct what we create.

But it means the world to those who create when someone says,

Wow, I was really touched by the video you put together. The way you drew me in and set that scene up and then reworked it with a complete twist. Man, that hit me hard!

or

Wow, you know what? The sound in [some venue] yesterday was really good. Normally I cannot hear what the electric guitar is doing, but you took the time to make sure all the instruments on the stage were heard. Good job!

or

Whoa! That presentation was excellent! I saw the violin sitting there behind you as you spoke, but had no idea why it was there. Then, at just the right point, you introduce this incredible musician who plays an amazing piece that absolutely drives your point home. That was incredibly powerful!

or

You know what? That graphic you created to represent the cleansing power of water really moved me. It fit so well with all the other visual elements.

Giving specifics shows you really paid attention. Telling them shows you cared enough to write/say something. Telling them something good encourages them to do more.

And creating more is what creative people live for.

When you see something good, tell them. And be specific.

Spread the love.

1 Comment »

At one point, I had thought about doing a blog on parenting, being a dad, etc. I envisioned someone Googling “How to be a better dad” and seeing my site “DadMustard” pop up on the top of the list. (My brother-in-law said, “huh, I never would have thought of someone doing that.” Needless to say, I wasn’t terribly encouraged!) I had this concept that I would write music – focusing on things I want my kids to learn or know – and then I would create questions to go along with the music. Questions that dads could ask their kids.

Of course, having worked in marketing, I wanted to do a little market analysis (ha! big mistake). So I sent my first song off to some friends and family members with the little review worksheet. I think only one of them actually tried to do what I asked (thanks Bill G.). Needless to say, I became a little frustrated and went on with life.

I haven’t really given up on the idea that I need to make the most of my time with the kids, though. Lots to teach while I got them.

Now, years later, I may not be trying to “market” that particular concept, but – even with the less-than-perfect sound of the recording – I still like what the song says to my kids, to my wife, to anyone I love.

Maybe it will speak to you. Originally, I called it The First Thing because it talks about the first thing I want my kids to know. A good friend suggested You Make My Heart Smile would be a better title. He’s probably right (Gregg usually is). So, here is You Make My Heart Smile.

It’s the first thing I recorded with my home studio gear years ago (ha! maybe that’s what the title really means) – so definitely not perfect. But I’ve given up on being perfect anymore.

In that spirit, I’ll even link here to some of the questions I had prepared for that song. At a minimum, it might make you ask whether you need to tell your kids how much you love them and how important they are to your life. Your time is limited. Make the best of it.

2 Comments »

She drew flowers
and birds

and a sun shining bright

Her hand held mine

She said all she could -
I love you -

and smiled

She explained the vine
and how it surrounds us

She gave me a hug

and left

me better.

–
5 July 2004
1st comment below explains what I was thinking (if you are interested).

1 Comment »

(That’s about -2 degrees Fahrenheit for the metrically-impaired.)

Discipline is doing things you know you should even when you don’t feel like it. Today it was negative 19 degrees Celsius at about the time I usually go for a run. I skipped yesterday for a number of reasons. (Ok, it was only actually one - I was grumpy.)

But today was different. I slept last night. A lot. I got up early. Had time to think – clearly.

My wife has told me – more than once – “You think too much. Stop thinking and start doing!” She’s probably right (most wives are, aren’t they?).

If you’re sort of joining me on this journey to being closer to who you were made to be; if you’re trying to move towards working in areas about which you are passionate; or if you are a creative type would like nothing more than to create, then here’s the deal: you’ve got to take steps in that direction. Regularly.

And sometimes that takes discipline.

Going for a run today reminded me of that. And it felt good.

I bet you’ll feel better the next time you do that thing you know you need to do, too.

4 Comments »

I really enjoyed listening to this interview as I edited it. I know you will enjoy it and learn from it as well. This is not just for musicians, but for anyone seeking to make their passions a bigger part of their life. I’ve broken the interview into two MustardCasts and used a less “high fidelity” setting to make the file sizes a bit more manageable. I hope you audiophiles will be ok with that.

Part I (MustardCast 3a)
Length: 16:27

Play or Download MustardCast 3a
Play MustardCast #3a, interview with Brit Rice, in iTunes

Download the .mp3 file of MustardCast 3a, interview with Brit Rice (5.6mb)

• Intro / How did you get into the music business?
• 3:30 How did you crack into the studio scene?
• 5:20 What’s your favorite part? Playing, producing, songwriting? What’s the role of the producer?
• 7:55 Do you feel that the concept of album/cd is a lost art? Is there still an audience for the album?
• 10:35 What do you feel is essential for great music?
• 13:00 What do you feel structure does to the ability to deliver emotion in a song?

Brit’s recommended listening:

• The New Congress
• Chris Coza

Part II of the MustardCast (3b)
Length: Approx. 19 Minutes

Play or Download MustardCast 3b
Play MustardCast #3b, interview with Brit Rice, in iTunes

Download the .mp3 file of MustardCast 3b, interview with Brit Rice (6.6mb)

• 16:45 Talk about some of the sacrifices you’ve had to make to do the things you love.
• 21:10 What do you struggle with as someone trying to work your passion?
• 22:20 Would you share your mom’s philosophy of drumming?
• 23:10 How important is it to you to have your parents support what you are going after?
• 27:27 What do you fear the most as a musician?
• 30:08 What encouragement could you give to people who want to move towards doing something they are passionate about?

Learn More About Polydream
Listen to samples and buy Polydream music at iTunes
Polydream’s MySpace site
Polydream’s Website

3 Comments »

It finally snowed a bit here in Madison, WI yesterday. Not a ton of snow, but enough that it made sense to shovel. This year, I went all out and bought this semi-fancy shovel with a thick handle and, to really ensure I get it all, a metal edge along the bottom of the “solid” plastic scoop area. Seriously, this is supposed to be a great shovel.

After a clearing a small portion, however, this shiny new shovel was really disappointing. Sure, it’s got metal along the bottom, but it doesn’t seem to hit the pavement evenly. So, while fine for some types of snow, it wasn’t clearing my walk all that well. Looks great, but doesn’t really deliver.

I went back into my garage and grabbed an old, all metal scoop shovel that a retiring family gave to ours as they headed to Florida. This thing is old, orange, beat up, bent, rusty – some would look at it and simply put it out with the trash.

But this shovel worked perfectly. It cut right down to the pavement and performed exactly as I needed.

The shovel reassured me of something. So often I’m worried about improving myself, learning more, developing more, looking better or more impressive, or getting ready to – someday – be truly useful in this world. But my bent, rusty snow shovel shows me that sometimes the perfect tool for the job doesn’t look perfect at all.

Most of us don’t look perfect. But we wish we did. I love my bent, rusty snow shovel. It’s perfect for just the right job.

So are we. Right now. As we are.

2 Comments »

I’ve been to two funerals in the last week. Both people left notable legacies.

One was a woman I never met directly, but indirectly through her son. What a legacy she left.

Another was a high school teacher of mine who had a tremendous impact on my life and my musical journey.

Both funerals were wonderful celebrations of lives well lived.

The thing about great funerals is that they cause you to pause. Pause and think. Think about the impact you are making and how you will be remembered.

Am I having an impact like that?

I know, it’s not right to compare, but it’s also not wrong to get introspective every now and then and think about our lives and whether we need to make some changes.

One notable is that I missed my opportunity to tell this teacher how much he impacted my life. I missed my chance to tell him it was worth it. That regardless of all the crap he put up with, he made a difference – a big difference. I missed a chance to thank him for his encouragement. To tell him how that made all the difference.

Are there people in your life that you need to thank?

If you were gone tomorrow, how would you be remembered?

No Comments »

I delivered a document to a large global client late last night. Then I worried. “What if they think I’m nuts?” “What if they don’t agree with the approach I took?”

Basically, I was going to worry about it until I heard some feedback.

Finally, around mid-day today, I got the word – key people were really impressed with the thought process in the document.

I could breathe a sigh of relief.

And, it made me feel good. I did something that people liked. It made me want to do more things that people like.

Ken Blanchard of The One Minute Manager fame talked about this a bit in a lecture I attended a year or so ago. He used the example of how experts train killer whales like Shamu. He said, “Do you think they beat up a whale when it doesn’t do what he’s supposed to? No, they catch the whale performing the desired action and they reward it.”

His whole message was on catching people doing something good.

It’s an interesting managerial approach and an even more interesting approach to raising our kids. It’s easy to get caught up in the “don’t do that, don’t say that, stop that, etc.” We jump into action when something annoys us enough to want it to stop.

But when we see good, we often let it slide – or simply don’t notice. It’s making our life easy, so, no need to comment. We simply do nothing – mind our own business and enjoy the peace.

But that’s so wrong!

It’s when our kids are doing good that we need to spring into action. We need to show them how much we love it when they listen, share, resolve conflicts with their siblings, exhibit good sportsmanship, or treat friends in a loving manner.

When we reward their good behavior, they taste the fruits of their labor. And they like it.

Give it a try. Catch your kids doing something good. Reward them somehow – if only some brief words of praise. See what happens. I think you’ll be surprised.

No Comments »

I was thrown an incredibly tight deadline today. For an incredibly large client. And while I generally find myself a fairly non-corporate guy in spirit (you wouldn’t know that from my resume), I am actually looking forward to this.

Why?

There is a woman in Asia holding a training session and she desperately needs materials/information/guidance to allow her to succeed – or even survive. And she would be grateful for any help we offer.

The Cynics Response
Sure, you could say “Why did she wait until the last minute?” I’ve certainly asked that many times in situations like this over the last 10-15 years. But answering that question won’t help her in the short-term.

For me, there is no greater satisfaction than in helping someone – especially someone who is truly grateful. (And her situation is likely not her fault anyway.)

I’ve struggled for years over whether “helping” needed to be in a non-profit organization. And, maybe I could help people with greater needs in a non-profit. However, as long as I am making my money in the business world, it is great to find opportunities to help real people – even if they are just a cog in some big corporate wheel. They are still people.

Could You Help Someone?
Maybe you’re a bit like me and you still dream of changing the world. Is there a way you could help others in your job? There are probably more opportunities than you think.

A Little ManagerMustard
Managers, you might take note of what motivates each of your team members. Every person is different. For some it may be acknowledgment or public praise. For others it may be about the difference they can make. Find out what motivates your team members and play to those individual drivers. You’ll see results. Trust me. For more on this, read Marcus Buckingham’s The One Thing You Need to Know.

No Comments »