At one point, I had thought about doing a blog on parenting, being a dad, etc. I envisioned someone Googling “How to be a better dad” and seeing my site “DadMustard” pop up on the top of the list. (My brother-in-law said, “huh, I never would have thought of someone doing that.” Needless to say, I wasn’t terribly encouraged!) I had this concept that I would write music – focusing on things I want my kids to learn or know – and then I would create questions to go along with the music. Questions that dads could ask their kids.

Of course, having worked in marketing, I wanted to do a little market analysis (ha! big mistake). So I sent my first song off to some friends and family members with the little review worksheet. I think only one of them actually tried to do what I asked (thanks Bill G.). Needless to say, I became a little frustrated and went on with life.

I haven’t really given up on the idea that I need to make the most of my time with the kids, though. Lots to teach while I got them.

Now, years later, I may not be trying to “market” that particular concept, but – even with the less-than-perfect sound of the recording – I still like what the song says to my kids, to my wife, to anyone I love.

Maybe it will speak to you. Originally, I called it The First Thing because it talks about the first thing I want my kids to know. A good friend suggested You Make My Heart Smile would be a better title. He’s probably right (Gregg usually is). So, here is You Make My Heart Smile.

It’s the first thing I recorded with my home studio gear years ago (ha! maybe that’s what the title really means) – so definitely not perfect. But I’ve given up on being perfect anymore.

In that spirit, I’ll even link here to some of the questions I had prepared for that song. At a minimum, it might make you ask whether you need to tell your kids how much you love them and how important they are to your life. Your time is limited. Make the best of it.

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I read somewhere that the 8th deadly sin was busyness. Or maybe it was hurry. Either way, hurry and busyness are two terrible challenges for me. (And the reason I haven’t posted in a while.)

Over the last months Mary Elizabeth and I started to notice some changes in our dog, Bailey (13). She was drinking a ton of water and acting a little strange. She just didn’t seem herself and seemed to have lost her spark.

Well, after I finally got her checked out by the vet (and paid for a couple sets of serious blood work) they ruled out all the typical culprits (kidney failure, diabetes, Cushing’s disease). Before the results of the tests, we thought that Bailey might be “getting ready to go.” We started paying a little more attention to her. Petting her a little more often. Caring for her a bit more. Showing her some attention. Giving her some time.

Funny. She doesn’t seem to be acting as strange anymore. Sure, her joints are bothering her and she can’t go for a three-mile run like she used to. . .but. . .

Could it be that our dog was simply suffering from a lack of attention?

Mary Elizabeth and I think so.

It’s a powerful thing – attention. It takes time and effort.

Man, and if our dog suffers for a lack of it, imagine our kids.

Just something to think about.

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Dreaming about a thing in order to do it properly is right; but dreaming about it when we should be doing it is wrong.

This quote is from a Christian preacher, Oswald Chambers, who lived into the early 1900s. The guy is intense. Real. No-nonsense.

I told my daughter last night to shower. 10 minutes later she was still clearly not in the shower. Why? She had chosen to do other things. She lost focus.

And she irritated me immensely!

But she also made me think about God. I wondered if God was irritated with me because He has told me to do things and I just get distracted with all sorts of other things, lose focus, and end up dreaming about doing those things instead of actually doing them.

Actually, I don’t really see God as getting irritated. Maybe more frustrated. Sort of like. “Look, John, I told you what to do – it’s right there. I’ve made you for this, got it all ready to go, now do it!” And then I see Him looking at me with compassion as I sit frustrated or depressed about not doing what I want to be doing because I am wondering “how will I be able to do this?” and “can this really be what I’m supposed to be doing?”

Basically, we don’t have faith. We don’t believe in the possibility of those dreams. (My daughter just didn’t care about getting showered, so clearly the similarities stop somewhere.)

So, for us to put our dreams into action, we have to first believe they are possible. Without that, we’ll never get anywhere.

Do you believe your dreams are possible?

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She drew flowers
and birds

and a sun shining bright

Her hand held mine

She said all she could –
I love you -

and smiled

She explained the vine
and how it surrounds us

She gave me a hug

and left

me better.

–
5 July 2004
1st comment below explains what I was thinking (if you are interested).

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My kids worked up a song for their mom this Christmas. Maybe your kids would like to sing along?

Listen to We Love You Mom!. (4.2mb .mp3)

Keep in mind, we had to write and record this when mom wasn’t around, so the kids didn’t get much practice time! (and I mixed it a lot in the headphones, which isn’t always the best.) Alissa (9) actually recorded the little solo too – she was pretty excited to do that.

I think it’s fun and says a lot of things moms need to hear.

View the lyrics of We Love You Mom! (76kb .pdf).

Enjoy.

PS. If you liked that, you might also enjoy last year’s Christmas gift to mom, a song called Super Mom. It’s a rocker.

Play Super Mom. (3mb .mp3)

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Time: late afternoon
Setting: my home office

Noah, age 6, enters. . .

Noah: Is it ok if I go over to [a neighbor friend’s] house to play?

Dad (flatly): Yeah, that would be fine.

Noah (stops, concerned): Are you sad? You sound kinda sad.

Dad: Not about you playing. It’s just my work today wasn’t very fun.

Noah (matter-of-factly): Sometimes school isn’t fun either. (Heads for the door)

Noah (shouting as he leaves): Love ya! Bye!

–
I could write about how cool it was that Noah was concerned. I could write about how he tried to relate to my problems. I could write about how his tone about school was so perfect – as if he were saying, “yup, some days are better than others.” Or I could just leave it all alone and let the dialogue speak for itself without comment. That’s what I think I’ll do.

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